It’s true, you can’t go home again…

Kayaking on Lake Union, Seattle.

God I love my blog… a place where I can say whatever I wish!!!

I’ve spend time this summer reconnecting with my kids and their families… at least giving it my best shot.  But I feel disconnected. 

Revisiting places (right photo, house on right, used to live there) I have lived in the past sometimes brings good memories, but mostly bittersweet memories… and really, who needs that?  I’ve spent a couple days in West Seattle where I used to live and found myself thinking about people I knew here, thinking about getting in touch, driving past where they used to live, looking them up online, sending emails to some… but then just parking someplace I felt safe and enjoying the waterfront instead of making human contact.

I was even able to locate on line a good friend of mine from the past (college in Indiana) who moved out here in the 80s? I think, and sent her an email but have not heard anything.  Come to think of it, most of the people that I knew here, I really have nothing in common with, except our lives crossed paths briefly back then.  I guess I am just curious but don’t seem to have any steam to actually follow-through on reconnecting with them again. So here I sit a few blocks away from the lighthouse on Alki Point, West Seattle, just wondering what I will do next to pass the time before my plane leaves for Alaska on 8/19.

Maybe I am just becoming an old hermit or ol’ crone for real?? I had even added some new events, pages, people to my Facebook but realized this morning, that all that just seems to be cluttering up my life, so I am in the process of removing them for now.  I’ve lost desire to be with people who either don’t like me or don’t want me around.  There is no fun in that for me. 

Left: Richard and me in Europe (Chris behind me) in 1968.  Right: Richard in 2013.

My son is so exhausted from overwork and too much partying(i.e.fun) to have much time for me, though he has spent some quality time with me and made me feel very good.

Left: Tori and me in 1991.  Right: Tori in 2013.

My granddaughter, Tori,  has shown little interest in me or my life for over a decade now, though I am hoping she will give me some quality one-on-one time before I go to Alaska.  I sent her this message:

Is there any chance of you giving me any one-on-one time before I go to Alaska to kayak? It would have to be fun/good for both of us... and if you think it's something that just can't happen... of course with all that you are doing during your visit, I would understand, I am o.k. either way.

Maybe I have nothing left in common with my own relatives/ descendants except that our lives crossed briefly for a short time????

Kayaking with my son, Richard Bailey,
on Lake Union, Aug. 7,2013 (houseboats in background).

But I am here now, I am available now… my kayak is here now.  All anyone can do is be available… for a short time!  It doesn’t get any better than that!  Others lives seem so structured and they have so many rules to live by… makes me very happy I have simplified my life.

I’m really ready to get on up the road, visit other “vandwellers,” see Alaska, have a nice leisurely drive down the WA-OR-CA coast, visiting more friends and vandwellers on the way and then returning to my winter home in Quartzsite AZ to relax, to make jewelry for the winter and to attend the annual Rubber Tramp Rendezvous there in Jan. 2014 where I will get to reunite with my tribe… people I have developed life-long friendships with, people with whom I do share many common interests.

Left is a ring I made last winter, right is a ring that was my mother’s which I am going to duplicate this winter.  Looking at the two of them, I realize mine is much higher quality than my mom’s.  She probably spent a lot for her ring, but mine only cost about $15 in materials, and I cut and polished the stone myself, and did all the silver work myself.  Once the duplicate is done, I will send my Mom’s ring to my sister in Florida. (My mom’s was not even Sterling Silver and mine is.)

Also this winter, I plan to begin dancing again to get in better shape (I stopped dancing the year my granddaughter was born – 1991, because my knees were so bad and unstable).  I have to begin seriously training for the Arizona Trail which I will hike in 2015… 820 miles from Mexico to Utah.  I am very excited about this next phase of my life.  I feel 20 years young than I felt 10 years ago.

Yes, my feet are itchy again.

On The Road Again… hard to leave the grandbabies.

I've had a great visit getting to know my grandkids and I think it was positive for them too. I'm so happy my daughter-in-law was able to make the kids available to me. She is a gem. Wish I had had even more time with all of them... but ...they have very busy lives. As a school teacher, when Jenelle is off work, she likes to spend lots of quality time with her kids.

She said, “Look, it’s a little van just like Grandma’s home.”

But I told them I was headed to Alaska and would be kayaking with the Whales and Icebergs. Now Zoey wants me to carve her a polka-dotted pink Whale and a polka-dotted yellow Whale for Will. Carved like I carved the little yellow kayaks. That's just the coolest.

It was great, but now I’m headed up into the mountains to look for a little fresh air and solitude, if such a thing is available between here and Seattle.  My flight to Alaska isn’t until about 8/18-19… so I have some time to kill but need to do it where air is cleaner, fresher and hopefully a little cooler.

Beautiful Grandchildren

I have been spending time with my beautiful grandchildren. My little angel Zoey just told me I was her very best Grandma (mission accomplished).  These past five years have been very difficult for me, not being a daily part of their lives.  I don’t know if they will ever know and love me, as I knew and loved my Grandma… so I’ll settle for them just “remembering” me.

After swimming lessons, I got to braid Zoey's hair... while she warmed up with hot cocoa. Then I got to read them a story, AFTER they came out and explored my van home. This one remembers EVERYTHING (and I hope me).  Next week they begin swimming lessons each weekday morning.  I am going to get a Pool membership and swim laps in the morning, before their lessons, or maybe during their lessons.  Its about to get really hot in Wenatchee, and $44 for the rest of the time I am in the area, a place to exercise and keep cool and spend time with them… not a bad deal at all.  They live nearby.

Yesterday was a great day. In the morning, I WON a new Global Sun Oven, in the afternoon I spent time at a wading pool park and my little granddaughter was coloring a picture, so I showed her my sketchbook… now she introduces me as “This is my grandma, she is an artist and kayaks everywhere.” At one point she reached over and hugged me and said “You are my very best grandma! I love you.” Well, there just isn’t any way a day can get better than that. When the solar oven arrives, I will be showing them how to cook in it and that too will be a fantastic day.

I won a Solar Oven – this was the winning photo.  I can’t believe it.  There are five more ovens being given away over the next five weeks.  Check out the Contest. Just enter your email address for a chance to win.  For the rest of the story about what was going on with this little critter, see my Facebook Album on the Sun Oven Contest.

I'm thrilled. In Jan 2014 at the Rubber Tramp Rendezvous in Quartzsite AZ, I will be drawing tickets to give my old Sun Oven to another vandweller. I never won anything before, but others have helped me along the way, so this is my way of paying it forward a little. There are other photos in this series... and I wish now I had video-taped it... it was so funny watching this little critter trying to get into the Oven.

Will has an engineers' brain... a real problem-solver. He is also kind of a loner. I watched him happily play with water for a very long time, very capable of entertaining himself.  Very very smart.

This is where I took the kids kayaking the other day – Walla Wall Park in Wenatchee.  You can clearly see the little alcove if you click on that link… an ariel view.  I could not get photos myself, but my dau-in-law took some and I'm hoping to get copies to post here.  Nice little alcove with an island, which had Mulberry Trees on it.  Columbia River is behind the island.  Zoey and I picked Mulberries from the kayak.  Neat.

June 28th, I joined them at this small park for water splashing and climbing on the playground, and coloring.  Nice little park with Recreation Staff keeping a close eye on all the kids, making sure they Play Nice in the water.

Zoey in playground jail.. she is trying to look worried and afraid.  Will, or Buddy (Grandpa was nicknamed Buddy and his dad was called Bud… so cute), being his devilish self.  Look at those sweet faces.

How the heck can it get better than this?  If it does, my heart might explode.

Payday… two days away.

I’ve been camping around Elko NV at various store parking lots… just waiting out the two weeks before payday… and day after tomorrow is it.  Yahooooooo!  I think I gotta go over those mountains to get to Salt Lake City, UT.  It’s been so cold here.  Uggghhh!

A couple of days ago, I splurged and bought Frosted Flakes (see photos below). Last night I splurged and got dinner from a Chinese place… rice, sesame chicken, and seafood combo, and two egg rolls.  Oh boy, did that hit the spot.  And I got a couple fortune cookies:

1) You’ll accomplish more later if you have a little fun this weekend.

OK that fits.  I had fun this weekend, sleeping in each day, doing two sketches for pay (total $100.00), listening to music, watching some t.v. shows, and going to bed early.

I’m ready for MORE accomplishments.

2) Next full moon brings an enchanting evening. 

Gotta go look that up, just so I don’t miss it.  Hum, May 5 will be the next full moon.  That is the day I am suppose to arrive at my summer job/home.. at the campground.  Ya think I’m a’gonna meet a fella????  Maybe not.  Maybe I’m just going to feel really enchanted when I reach my summer home.

Today I will finish the two sketches I’m working on and then do an inventory of all the food on board.  My plan for Colorado is to only come down off the mountain about once a month.  That takes a bit of careful planning.  Anyone interested in seeing the food inventory and the one-month plan for food purchases???

Today is my eldest son’s birthday… he is 46.  WHAT?  How can that be?  Happy Birthday, Chris.

Chris in 1966, Teheran, Iran.

Chris’ daughter, Zoey in 2008, Wenatchee, WA.

Chris in Tehran Iran, 1966.  So that made me hungry for Frosted Flakes… something I haven’t had for years.

Chris and his girlfriend, Jenelle, hiked the entire Pacific Crest Trail together… this at Crater Lake.

When I got my Master’s Degree, Chris drove back to Indiana from Maryland with me for my commencement.  Thanks, Chris, that meant the world to me.  Wish your brother and Tori had come too.

Chris and Jenelle hiked the whole Pacific Crest Trail in five months.  Guess they figured they were compatible after all that and so they got married by Elvis in Vegas.

Once a backpacker, always a backpacker. 
This is their first child, Zoey.  Too cute.

Zoey and mom on left,
Mom and Dad with son Will and daughter Zoey on right.

Beautiful Zoey at Christmas.  Reading and books are their favorite activities.  They get two stories read to them each night before bedtime.  They’ve asked me to only send books as gifts.

This is the first time I ever saw Will… and isn’t that the greatest smile.

Will and I had matching haircuts.

Zoey really loves her baby brother and is so gentle with him.

Grandma really loves Zoey’s little brother too, but wasn’t so gentle with him… first time I picked him up out of his car seat, I caught his finger in the buckle and made him cry.  Made him cry???  I made myself cry!  Thank goodness he won’t remember it.

It doesn’t get any better than this.  Not even tomorrow.  Chris and Jenelle, you are beautiful and are great parents.  Thank you for the wonderful gifts you have given me… Will and Zoey.