John Denver Lyrics

My memory of love will be of you.  Is that the title?  My husband is on my mind this morning and the lyrics of John Denver’s songs.  So many of his songs really speak to me… especially this summer when I am working in the Rocky Mountains high.

“When I think of LOVE, I’ll think of you” David Swankie.
Perhaps love is like a resting place
A shelter from the storm
It exists to give you comfort
It is there to keep you warm

And in those times of trouble
When you are most alone
The memory of love will bring you home

Perhaps love is like a window
Perhaps an open door
It invites you to come closer
It wants to show you more

And even if you lose yourself
And don't know what to do
The memory of love will see you through

Oh, love to some is like a cloud
To some as strong as steel
For some a way of living
For some a way to feel

And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go
And some say love is everything
And some say they don't know

Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of pain

Like a fire when it's cold outside
Or thunder when it rains

If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you (David Swankie)

Maybe it is impossible to find love again, but I am not even looking.  It is simply beyond my comprehension.  All I know is that David Swankie, in eight days of marriage (all spend in the hospital) fulfilled me more than anyone in my entire life. 

Hospital marriage ceremony May 27, 2001, Everett, WA.

During those days preceding open heart surgery, we talked about how sure we were he would survive as we believed there was a purpose for our meeting, union and marriage. We felt there was “something” we needed to accomplish.

Now, eleven years later I know what that purpose is… for me to be a shining example to others to LIVE, not just exist. Forest Rangers have listened to my story this summer and commented, “You are my new hero!”  Wow, I’ve never been a hero to anyone that I know of.  Would be to hear that from my family members, not strangers.  But if I never hear it from anyone, that is o.k. too, I hear it in my head and my heart and daily say “Thank you David Swankie, for my new life.
-4 years after he died, his insurance gave me new knees
-new knees allowed me to be active again
-being active again allowed me to loose weight
-loosing weight allowed me to have higher adventures (i.e. kayaking 50 states, hiking hours on end, working for the Forest Service – a lifelong dream)
- working for the Forest Service has allowed me to really trim the rest of the fat
- trimming the rest of the fat and reaching my goal weight and fitness level will allow me to… ?????
What?  Who knows!

So, my wish for others, or if I could leave a legacy it would be to leave this message: Never give up. Reach for your dreams. I could not have imaged my life today (in 2012), back there in that hospital in Everett, WA in 2001.  In spite of any nay-sayers (i.e. trolls) who might try to put a shadow on your happiness, keep fighting… you can have anything you can dream.