Escape Into The Wild

No fitness plan summary, no weekly blog update, no goals… just nothing.

Something is wrong.  Something is off.  I have lost my mo-jo.  Woke up a few days ago and realized this… and decided it needed to be fixed.  ... I didn't know how depressed I was until I got home... in the WILD.  Most of this year I have felt like my cup was empty, but the past couple of days, I have begun to find my mo-jo to put back into it. Stay true to your heart and soul.

It was the first time in a very long time where I had my trailer (and all my worldly possessions) in travel mode… and my feet got very itchy.  All the goals I had lined up for this season, seems to be vanishing before my eyes. The values I had, seemed not to exist anymore.  OK, this can not be.  Time to get lost (or is it found?).

With no pre-determined idea of where I was going, I just headed out away from Quartzsite and what had been my dream/plans for this winter season.  It is amazing how your frame of mind changes, once you have all your possessions in tow and no reason to "go back" anyplace. I just can't sit still in a camp any longer. I need to be on the go. Spend way too much time in Quartzsite, just sitting around waiting for others, waiting for classes, waiting for payday, and eating, and sitting and eating. While I was traveling and kayaking all the time... I looked and felt much better. So, I'm off in search of my mojo again. Thinking most likely I will postpone my AZ Trail hike one more year as I need to replace my house batteries (about $600 expense). I could be in areas without signals... so don't expect as much activity here or on Facebook.

I need to get out and just enjoy nature again.  People so confuse me.  The downside of living in the desert is going to bed when it gets dark, and getting all the rest you need by 1am or so. Then not being able to go back to sleep. Sure beats the depression I was feeling in urban camping though... where I just wanted to sleep all the time.  Here, I can’t wait to get up, get out, look at stuff, see wildlife, take photos, think, breath clean air (Quartzsite air is amazingly polluted especially in Jan.).

I’m not a thrill seeker.  I don’t look for “danger” for fun, but somehow this sign make me feel good.  The environment was no longer bland like Quartzsite.  I love the desert but Quartzsite has been so depleted of anything geologically interesting, and there are so many politics when you are in civilization, whether it is politicians or just citizens… someone is always being greedy or trying to get the best of someone else.

After spending the day exploring, hiking, driving, I got off into the wilderness, maybe a little too far, as I am not sure I can get back out again without help. (Help is on the way!)

But, in the meantime, I introduced myself to me.  Where have you been, I asked?  I don’t know!!! was my reply.  Guess I am loosing my mind.  I’m talking to myself, but we are very good company for each other, me, myself and I.

So, I took another hike and talked to the Joshua Tree instead.

Another hike and another tree conversation with the Palo Verde.

Took another two hour hike in the desert looking for petrified palm wood... and all I found was lots and lots of chalcedony. Suppose to be jasper and agates around here too but I think I am 12 miles off where I should be. Not going to try to make it the rest of the way in 2 wheel drive. I went until the wash dropped off 20ft vertically. What a sight.

Oh, look, there is Swankie, all the way down the 20’ drop off in the wash.  I climbed down to have a chat with her.  Went a little farther and another bigger drop off… no burro tracks to follow, so I turned back.

A couple nights in this wonderful place, and I don’t want to leave.  However, I must leave while I have some help getting out.  There was a pretty fast drop in elevation on a very sandy road.  My trailer is way to heavy for me to pull it back up that elevation with a 2 wheel drive van.  I guess I may have to settle for life on the edge of the wilderness… I’ll have to stick to harder surfaces so long as I am pulling a trailer full of rocks and genealogy.  (in my  next life, I’ll have a 4-wheel drive vehicle and will travel without a ton of genealogy in tow)

So some serious soul searching is going on.  I still want to hike the AZ trail, even more so after a couple days of wandering aimlessly in the desert. So much to see out here.  But what happened to my goals?  What happened to the Rock Club time I planned on this winter???  One: My house batteries are six years old and on their last legs.  Cost of replacing them conflicts with funds needed for the Arizona Trail Hike.  I can’t do both.  It was depressing me.  Two:  People were depressing me.  I never have mal-contempt toward others, yet people are reacting to things I say and do as if I do.  I guess they don’t get that such things can be very hurtful…. to a person with a good heart.  It’s happened too many times in the last couple of years…. and so I need to escape, re-access, etc. and so forth.

Here are my new neighbors. Free, free at last, back into the wild.

All is well. I have officially escaped into the wild. I have reactivated my SPOT device... so I can find myself. I know the way out again, but don't want to go. All I can hear at night is a couple crickets and a few high airplanes, and there are burro hoof prints on the ground outside. I didn't know how "un-free" I was feeling until I got back in the wild.  All night long, I heard burros braying and nothing else.

I saw this on Facebook this morning and think I need to play with it a bit and tweak it to fit my lifestyle:

Why did you dance today? · Denpasar, Indonesia ·

Today I celebrate 500 days of dancing everyday...

Am on the 500th day of my running, dancing, yoga, meditation, singing, drawing, drumming, and writing streak.

Today I ran wild and free for an hour in the rice fields and mountains of Bali to enjoy the feeling of aliveness I get when I run, and danced to get inspiration and ideas for choreographing the musicals I am directing in Bali.

I have found it very inspirational to keep track of the days. The longer I keep the streak going the more I benefit and more passionately I want to make sure to write, dance, run, meditate, draw, sing, drum, and practice yoga today.

I write, dance, run, meditate, draw, sing, drum, and practice yoga everyday, and I try to complete this in the morning, before I allow myself to check email or Facebook, but if I cannot complete everything I explore what I need to complete before I go to sleep.

I love to run for an hour, but if I do not have time, or my body says I should take it easy I always run at least a mile, and write, dance, meditate, draw, sing, drum, and practice yoga at least 2-10 minutes each.

Why did you dance today, and what did you do that was good for your body, mind, and spirit today?

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I have to adopt/adapt this philosophy/lifestyle to my own. I think living in the wild has to be one of my daily things. Out of the next 365 days, see how many of them I can spend with no other humans in view.  Should begin on Nov. 20... the day I escaped back into the Wild and began finding my mojo again. Two nights now. 363 to go.

Sometimes you just have to say, Whoa Back!  This was a surprise to me.  I thought I had a plan, but then once the trailer was hooked up… and I realized I did NOT have to go back if I didn’t want to… it all kind of fell apart, or fell together, or something.  I don’t know, but I can take all the time I want to sort it all out to decide what I need to do daily for the good of my body, mind and spirit.  I believe both Quartzsite and the Arizona Trail will still there when I am ready.  Today, I am smiling.

A Swankie Desk

I lived in Prescott, AZ the winter of 2004-2005.  This was my apartment.  I marvel, looking at this now, at all the stuff in this picture that I no longer have (chair, TV, monitor, PC, books, that printer, the file cabinet, and most of the papers… gone).  But the desk, not getting rid of it… it’s a work of art.  Made by an octogenarian (well he was probably younger than that when he made it), he gave it to me in 2004 and I love it.

The desk then lived in a storage unit for some time. Then I went to stay at a friend’s home in Monterey, CA…  to get some surgery and recover.  The desk  moved into my room in her home.  Barely room for a twin bed, a desk and chair and a few other small things. But the recovery time for the surgery, had me going from the bed to the desk, a few steps to the bathroom, and I got used to having everything within arms reach… good training for becoming a vandweller.  Note here, the carving work on the end of the desk.

Finally, in 2008, I got the van I had been dreaming about for years and was at a stage where I could transition from sticks and bricks to mobile living.  The process had begun… the desk now had to move into this space one way or another.

Others had suggested building a cardboard model of the things you need to place in the van, so you can work out how they will fit, so I did that.  Note the rounded thingy cutout.  I don’t know what it is, (probably the gasoline intake) but I know I had to cut a hole in the desk to get it to go against the wall.

Taking the cardboard back into the house, I laid it up against the back of the desk… and just sawed the wood off… holding my breath.

Here the desk is standing on one end… and I have determined that the top of the desk will need to be sawed off, and shortened in order for the desk to fit in the van.  Now, how to do that?  Looking back, I’m not sure how I did it, but it worked.

I then took the top outside where I had a nice picnic table to work on… and cut the legs off about two inches.  Oh, this was scary.  Was I destroying this lovely desk?  Would I ever get it all back together again, inside the van???

I was trying to walk this bottom part out the back door, down off the porch, and across the concrete patio and realizing I bit off more than I could chew, I flagged down a couple guys and asked them it they would carry and lift it into the van, and they were happy to help.  So there it is, in place.  Note the bottom shelf on the left, also had to have a notch cut out of it to get it to fit.  But, it’s in the van.

Notice the very artistic drawer pulls, made of gnarly old desert wood, which are fastened on with copper wire.  Love it.

Here you can see why the top of the desk had to be cut off to fit under that carpeted piece at the top, and come forward to fit the curve of the van wall.  I can’t tell you how hard this was to do, but after adding a few angle brackets to reattach it to the bottom of the desk, all is securely in place and NOTHING has moved in four years. (not saying it would all stay in place if I wrecked and rolled over like another vandweller did, but I have no plans to do so)

The desk top was then secured to the walls of the van with angle bracket and washers.  That is a little frightening too, and you have to know where the ribs or studs are in the wall… wasn’t hard to find as you can see where the screws are for the paneling (covered with tan plastic caps) about 10” directly above the washers.  Also larger L-brackets attached the desk itself to the floor of the van.

Finally, with everything secure, I could begin tweaking it all and finding a place for everything, and putting everything in it’s place.  The scalloped board was found in the trash, and fit nicely there (thinking I could mount a led light behind it something).  I built a box for the solar controller in the corner so I could monitor it while working at my desk.  Oh notice too, this was an old computer desk, and it had a keyboard tray with a power strip.  The power strip has since died and been removed, but the tray is still in place and most handy.  It’s my dinner table, work space, etc.  My laptop usually sits on the desk itself, but as I type this, it is sitting on the keyboard tray.

Still tweaking.  Loose stuff on top of the shelf would not stay in place.  I added a strip of yoga mat material to the top shelf and to all the shelf and desk surfaces.  This is really a great thing, as nothing slides around.  It was glued in place with the sticky glue stick and easily peals off, and some pieces just stapled on with a paper stapler.  Nothing fancy and it works like a charm. 

To the top shelf of the desk, I added quarter-round molding to keep things from sliding off to the front or side.  This is the space that now houses my negative and slide flatbed scanner.

The spacing didn’t suit me, so I raised the shelf, so the slide scanner just fit there, I take it out when I am scanning, and that left just enough space under the shelf for my All-In-One Printer/Scanner.  (Yes, I’m in the scanning stage of my life and didn’t want to waste another year remaining in sticks and bricks and paying rent to scan all the things I need to scan (40 years of genealogy research and hundreds of historic family photos and documents).  I’ve said for years, once I could afford the technology to hit the road and have a mobile computer lab, I would hit the road (this is the prime reason this desk was so important to me… it would house it all).

Boy does it fit well in the van… and I love it.  Notice on the left end of the desk, a space between the desk and the bed… that’s where my sanitation area is now located.

Evolution is a fickle thing.  The PC did not hold up well to all the vibrations of the road, and the hard drive finally died.  So, bye bye PC, speakers, and keyboard.  The large LCD monitor was almost new, so it is well padded and remains in that space, fits right in that curve of the van wall and takes up no extra space.  It was great to have it on hand this past winter when my laptop screen finally died… and I just plugged it in to the monitor and could still work, save files, and function until my sister and her marvelous hubby gifted me with a new laptop.  Warning… electronics are not made to jiggle and bounce around on the back roads of the wilderness.  They will fail.  Ron McDowell (RIP Ron) told me to replace the hard drive in the PC with a laptop hard drive (which would fit in one of the open slots like where the DVD and CD drives are).  He said that Laptop hard drives are made more sturdy and will take more abuse.

I loved the set-up but things just keep evolving.

I added some scrapes of wood to the front of the top shelf, to hold things in place and finally came up with those freezer container which fit perfectly and hold things like sewing supplies.  My address book and misc. other things are always handy. The little top shelf could not be more handy if I had planned it that way… just a happy accident.

I had decided I wanted to have a slide out board in the desk for my stove, but it actually took me about three years to work the design out in my head.  I found these grooved pieces of wood, and knew they would work. As you can see about four photos back, it was just one open shelf so I needed to find a way to put a divider in to attach the right runner to, which was the hardest part.  I bought a finished laminated white shelf board from Home Depot, added a door handle to it, cut the extra length off the back end of the board, and just slid it into place.  Again, a piece of Yoga mat material, keeps the stove from sliding around and a bungee cord goes across the space when the shelf is pushed in, but the shelf is tight and doesn’t jiggle out.  By the way, the vent fan is right above the stove, I couldn’t have planned it that way, it was just another happy accident.

My feet were always cold so I insulated the space under the desk.  Speaking of space, it was really all wasted space, since I had the keyboard tray, I never scooted all the way under the desk. The keyboard tray pulls right out into the isle. This too took me about three years to realize, but why not build shelves under there for food and canned goods.  So this past winter, I took on that little project (thank you for dying PC).

You can’t even begin to know how much food fits on those shelves.  It is amazing.

In conclusion,  you don’t need to have things all planned out perfectly before you hit the road.  Just get the basics done and hit the road.  For me the basics were 1) to be able to afford the technology to have a mobile computer lab, 2) to ensure fresh air by installing the Fantastic Vent fan, 3) to have a comfortable bed and 4) to get the solar and last but not least… to have a desk to work at.  The desk is now my computer lab and my kitchen all wrapped in the same space.  I have almost as much space as I had when staying with my friend in Monterey, but there are wheels under my floor.  It just doesn’t get any better than that, until tomorrow.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it, again.

39th State: Colorado - Jackson Lake (Oct. 11, 2011)

(Happy 20th Birthday to my beautiful granddaughter, Tori Bailey.)

Near Orchard, CO


Today is my first granddaughter’s 20th birthday, no more a teenager.

Tori and my son (her Dad) in Paris – September 2011.

Happy Birthday, Tori, this State Paddle is for you.

Sometimes a day starts out rotten and you think there is no way it will turn around, but today it did.  I had one of the most rewarding kayaking paddles yet.  Only 9 states of the lower 48 left to paddle.  Wow, I’ve done 39 states.
I had wanted to kayak North Sterling Park Reservoir but it was closed to boating.  I called to make sure it also meant kayaks, not just motorized boats.  All boats, in fact the Park was closed.  They suggested I try Jackson Lake near Orchard, CO.  Well, Sterling was dark, drizzly and windy… it looked like in the direction of Jackson, there was a blue hole in the sky and there was.

Once known primarily for the hunting around it’s banks, Jackson Lake State Park has become one of Colorado’s finest outdoor recreation and water sports sites.  The area is known for its shoreline camping and its large, warm-water reservoir with sandy bottom and beaches.  For fun in the sun and unlimited recreational opportunities, Jackson Lake is the place.  From Colorado State Parks brochure.  www.parks.state.co.us
… 2,700 surface-acre reservoir and the park of a total of 440 acres
… 260 campsites near or on the water, with showers, toilets, laundry, electric hookups and drinking water – can you imagine the craziness of all that in season?
… Shoreline Marina provides food and drink, boat rentals, boat storage, gas and boating, fishing and camping supplies.
… lake has trout, walleye, catfish, perch, crapple and wipers (whatever that is?)  (and one of those was jumping crazy)
… winter months… camping, wildlife observation, photography, ice fishing and ice skating
This is a very nice place off season… and so quiet and serene.  I loved it.

These large birds greeted me at the entrance, but what are they?  Cost $7 for daily.

Yes, I’m in my glory… and I love it like this.  Calm, partly cloudy, and NO people.  It just doesn’t get any better than this.  There was one boat trailer in the parking lot but he must have been at the Dam end of the lake as I never saw him until I headed in.

I saw many very large fish jump straight up out of the water… about a foot or more, but darned if I could catch it with the camera.  No matter which way I was looking the fish would be on the opposite side of me.  These were as close as I could get… and they were really big fish.

You’ll find beauty everywhere… you just have to be open to it.  Last good shot I got like the above was when I paddled Port Angeles Harbor, WA with GG.

Then I spotted this ol’ feller (Great Blue Heron?) and began trying to get the best shot of him that I could, when large shadows came across my boat.  What the heck?  Something was above me???  I turned the camera UP and began aimlessly clicking. Good thing I had the camera running, or I wouldn’t have caught these.

This might be the best photo of the day.  So I followed the Pelicans.  A whole flock was coming in for a landing or rest on their migration I would suspect.  You just enjoy the following photos of them… hopefully as much as I enjoyed the afternoon watching the Pelicans.  Boy, Tori, I wish you could have been here with me today.













The crane and I were both watching them all come in.






And then this old guy made a spectacular landing right beside my kayak… of course, the camera was off.  I’m thinking he was an old geezer who just has more fun watching another old geezer watch the youngling's in the flock, then being a part of the flock himself… just like ME!  Very interesting.  At least he thought I was interesting, or maybe he just thought I had food.  I wish I could have caught his landing… it was awesome.

And they just kept coming in.





Once in a while a few would take flight and buzz the flock… like they were showing off to get attention… maybe they were young males doing just that.  As I was leaving the very quiet lake, they had spread out along the shoreline where I was when they first came in… and suddenly I heard this noise that sound like the roar of a semi-truck in the near distance.  But, it was a whole group of the pelicans taking flight at a low level and feet hitting the water as they buzzed about in a tight circle… and the feet and wings made this low rumbling sound.  Never heard anything like it before.  My camera battery was dead so I could not get that shot… but it was breathtaking.

Misc. other photos…

A Rock?   Looks like a Buoy to me.

Looks to me like it was time to head in with that cloud coming in over my head.  Crazy thing… the cloud was going West, but the winds were coming from the West.  What the heck?
Now for a drive around the park.  Then time to leave, thinking, I can’t top this… there’s nothing else to see.  HA!

As I’m leaving the park, I see something cross the road ahead.  Quick, scramble in the back and find the camera I just plugged in to recharge.  What is it?  Then pulling closer…


… and closer, a flock of wild turkeys…  WOW and GEE WHIZ!  How can the day end any better?   Wait…  something else crossing the road.  A stray wild turkey, odd for one to get separated from the flock???

Darn… it just got better, a male pheasant.  These birds (the turkeys and the pheasant) were within feet of each other.  Amazing.

Enjoyed the last little bit of the area before hitting the highway.  On the right, don’t you just love those cloud formations.  Black spots in the sky are blackbirds, landing in the corn field.

On the distant horizon are the Rocky Mountains… and Denver. I always love this view… when you first see the Rockies.  I feel more at home with mountains in view than anywhere else on earth.
Whoops… sun in my eyes and still fighting the eye infection,  I have missed the turnoff to avoid downtown Denver, ugghhh, and there it is.  Here I thought the day couldn’t get better… and now it just got worse for me.  After one of the most quiet and serene days I’ve had in awhile… I’m heading into downtown Denver.


Then mother nature sends a full moon out from behind the clouds as if to reassure me I could get through this challenge (Denver) and come out the other end o.k.  But, oh my gosh, how do people live like this?  Do they know what they are missing out there?  And what’s all that talk about no funds being used for our “infrastructure?”  That’s all I’ve see all the way through SD, NE, and CO.  Road construction, must be millions of dollars worth as it just went on and on for miles.


But then there it was again, hiding behind the trees, as if to say, “Don’t worry, Swankie, I’ll still be around when you get out of that mess down there.  You can do it.  It will be O.K.“
So sometimes the day starts off rotten and even ends that way, but the middle was grand.  I was very tired by the time I got through Denver, but drove until about 8:30pm… just to get clear of the craziness know as a civilization… the CITY.  I was glad this day was over and will only remember the GRAND part of the day… nature and the birds.